Ember Glow
by aaliyahcrosses
Summary: She loved him. He hurt her. And now that she's crying over another man, why is he the one hurting? (ft: SasuSaku, SaiSaku, Owl City's Kamikaze, some lines from the manga, fluff, angst, character death(s))


**Warnings:** Character Deaths, Major SaiSaku &SasuSaku, Angst, Fluff, Owl City

 **Disclaimer:** _Naruto_ or any of its characters are not mine. The lyrics to the song _Kamikaze_ are not mine. All things belong to their rightful owners.

* * *

"Ah! It's pearls! Thank you!"

"Are you sure? I knew you like them but Miss Beautiful said diamonds are better and I've read pearls signify tears—"

"Tears can both mean _happy_ and _sad_ tears. For better or for worse, right? You'd still be there for me."

"I try."

"Again, thank you. Not _very_ romantic of you—I was expecting something more, because, well, you're almost always by the book—"

"I wanted to try myself, without anyone or any book guiding me."

"And you _definitely_ got me by _surprise_! Now, let's go! I bet Kakashi-sensei and Naruto's already waiting for us at the gates!"

"They'd wonder why we are late. Although, really, it was all your fault, Ugly. Had we not done—"

"Ah! Sai! Don't say it! Aloud! We're in the public! _Please_!"

"Okay."

"Sai!"

"...?"

"Come on! Hurry up!"

"..."

"Sai!"

"Sorry, you just looked beautiful there. I would have loved to paint you."

"..."

"That blush makes it even more so."

"...just... let's just go!"

—  
 _The_ _princess_ _in_ _her_ _flower_ _bed_  
 _Pulled_ _the_ _jungle_ _underground_  
—

Kill him. She was about to kill _him_. He waits. But she can't.

 _Caring is not an advantage. It never was. But then again, how can_ he _say? He was doing this because he_ cared _. He cared that he was lied to about his brother, he cared that his brother had been forced to kill their family._

He turns and tries to kill her with his chidori. He hits someone—someone that _isn't_ her.

He wonders why, in the far, far corner of his mind he thinks and feels relief. Had he not cut his ties with them? With _her_? Had he not told himself that he would annihilate the village (home, it used to be _home_ ) she lives in? That he would kill everyone that made his family suffer so?

 **You have to save her no matter what. I know you can save her. Once you've got her, carry her and run, as far, and as fast that you can.**

"SAI!" The kunoichi screams. He watches as she takes hold of the boy's body.

The way her voice trembles and rises makes him remember of their genin days, especially the time where he almost, _almost_ died, and she screamed _his_ name instead.

She begins healing him instantly.

—  
 _Where_ _cherry_ _bombs_ _stained_ _the_ _blackbird's_ _red_  
 _And_ _explosions_ _never_ _make_ _a_ _sound_  
 _—_

The boy was considerably wounded, tired and low in chakra when he (stupidly but _bravely_ —he gives him that) jumped and blocked the attack and protected _her_.

He remembers how he had once treated her as one of his precious people—someone he did not want to lose. Now he wants to kill her, and realizes that he had no hesitation when he tried to, awhile ago. It means that he had gone stronger... _right_? Or it could mean he had fallen, deeper and deeper into his _revenge_.

 **This has nothing to do with you. Stay out of my business. As I have already told you before, I am an avenger.**

 _That was what Sasuke Uchiha lived for: not justice, but revenge. So when he finally manages to kill his brother, he does not know what to do exactly. Until someone tells him that it wasn't his brother's fault. The cycle began again. He was_ alive _again. Because the reason he is still here is because of that. Because of revenge._

"Ug...ly..." The boy's speech is broken. He is speaking in mere almost-whispers.

He wonders why he's just standing _here_ , why he wasn't doing anything. He _could_ kill them. But he doesn't. He watches as the scene unfolds before him.

The boy continues, and with a smile, continues speaking. "We're... We're ev...en...now—"

"Shut up."

She does _not_ cry, but the _way_ she says it, reminds him of that time again.

 _ **Sasuke-kun!**_

Her voice echoes in his mind. He flinches.

"But _Ha..._ g," the paper-pale boy tries his hardest to speak still with the same smile. "I'm fine. It's... It's...f-fine."

Lies. It was obvious lies. He is dying.

"I said, _shut_ _up_ ," she growls, her teeth gritting. "Shut up. And stop with that stupid smile of yours. So I could concentrate. Because when we're finished—" here, her voice chokes. Is she going to cry?

 _Pathetic_ , is what he thinks. But also, _why? Why_ _him? Why_ _cry_ _for_ _him? Who_ _is_ _he?_

"When you're healed," her voice is steadier now. "I'll take you home and kick your sorry ass there because you scared _me_ of _almost_ dying."

When. Not if. _When_.

The boy chuckles. "Cruel Hag." His voice fainter this time. Dying. He is dying.

—  
 _My_ _captain_ _on_ _the_ _snowy_ _horse_  
 _Is_ _coming_ _back_ _to_ _take_ _me home_  
 _—_

"You came back." The blond boy who self-proclaimed himself as his best friend, said quietly as they waited outside her room.

It was a statement and a question. The question was _why?_ _Why_ _did_ you _come_ _back?_

The answer was painstakingly obvious: _for her_. Because that was the reason, wasn't it? It _was_ her. Had always been her.

 _She was_ Sakura _. Cherry blossom. Spring. Kakashi and Naruto and him, they had winters inside of them._ _No matter how nonchalant Kakashi is, no matter how cheerful Naruto seems, no matter how indifferent he is. They were the same (he just doesn't want to admit that). Except for her. She_ was _spring._

 **Even during winter it keeps it's beauty, never losing to the cold. A strong flower that waits for the hope of spring.**

He didn't reply though. Well, he did, but it was only a mere grunt. "Hn."

"Not talking, huh," the blond mumbled, sighing at his seat.

He hated it, waiting. And realized that would have been probably what she, what everyone was doing. Waiting for him to come back.

"Who was he?" He found himself asking. The boy had black hair and pale skin. He had so many uncanny similarities with him it was almost funny.

"Your replacement. You know, in the team."

Scratch that, it was hilarious. They replaced him with someone who looks like him and it's hilarious. A stupid, cruel, cruel hilarious joke.

"I always thought," the blond continued. "I always thought it was gonna be one of us. Always thought it was gonna be _you_. That she'd wait for you. I mean, she's liked you since our childhood. But then Sai came..."

Was he really that replaceable?

"And he was worse than you," the other boy sighed. "In fact, Sakura punched him during our initial meeting."

—  
 _Maybe_ _I'll_ _ride_  
 _To_ _save_ _my_ _life_  
 _—_

"Ugly..." The boy speaks again.

The kunoichi does not listen, and focuses on anything, anything she could do to alleviate his pain, to help him, to _save_ him.

"Sa...ku...ra..." He gathers all strength he has left, and holds her wrists. "It's _fine_. I'm fi...ne..."

It gets her attention, and she stops. And finally, finally, she starts crying. " _I_ 'm not! I can't just— You can't — I mean, I haven't even—... I can't lose you too... Because I lo—I lo—"

The way she blabbers reminds him of how she tried to stop him from leaving the village. He knows that desperation and sadness all tremulous and broken voice all too well. He wonders what would have happened if he hadn't said **thank you**. If he had stayed.

 **On that day, you taught me that solitude is painful... I understand that so well right now. I have family and I have friends.. but if you're gone... To me... It will be the same as being alone...**

The boy smiles. "I love you too."

She pauses, and her eyes widens in horror. She whispers. "No."

And he remembers again why he only thanked her. Because telling, saying much more would have hurt her even more.

The boy pulls her down and kisses her and she responds fervently as he dabbles with his own blood and draws at her skin with it. And then he stops. Dead.

She screams. And tries to bring him back to life. Again and again and again.

 _Why_ _does_ _it_ _hurt?_ He asks himself. _Why?_

Her chakra is visibly wavering—at the range she's going she'll be killing herself soon. So before he can even change his mind, he stays behind her and holds her, stops her (it's funny how _he_ 's the one stopping her for a change). She yelps, and struggles. He picks her up so she stands up.

"You killed him!" She yells, and she faces him and punches him. Again and again and again. And it was light, small punches that was very much unlike the punches he saw just awhile ago, marked by many craters around the place. Yet it hurt him all the same. She's still crying. "But, but I could've saved him. And I was the one who you were aiming for right? I should've been... I should've been the one to die." She stops, and her legs wobbles and she falls, sobbing. " _I should've been the one who died_."

He looks at her, and pretends not to notice the blood stained unfinished artwork the boy had painted on her skin. A flower, a blossom. Red swirling figures.

 _—_  
 _Maybe_ _I'll_ _fly_  
 _With_ _an_ _eagle_ _eye_  
—

"Oi, Sasuke."

"Hn?"

"I'm leaving. I have to check on Hinata."

"Hn."

He was left alone, and he doesn't know if he should be thankful or not for the silence.

"Uchiha-san?" A nurse went out of the room, avoiding looking at him, but calling him all the same, for the sake of professionalism, and perhaps, a bit of gratitude. "Sakura-san is fine now, she just needs to rest. The medicine she needed have already been administered. There is no need to worry."

"Aa."

The nurse nodded and hastily left. Afraid of him, he guessed. She wasn't wrong, because she _should_ be. Actually, he's mildly surprised that no one had taken him and brought him to questioning yet.

Now, he had nothing to worry about. She was fine. Now he could leave.

He stood up, and began walking away (like he did, all those years ago) but was stopped because of her voice. Again.

He turned to look.

"Sasuke-kun..."

The door to her room was open, and she was leaning heavily to the doorway and the knob. Fatigue was apparent from her features.

She walked, or at least hobbled towards him, in a slow pace.

He stood there, not knowing what he should do. Should he leave? Should he stay? But all thoughts about it were thrown out the window when she faltered and fell. He was beside her quickly, holding her up by her shoulders.

"Sasuke-kun..." She repeated.

He lead her to the chairs nearby, careful not to let her fall. He sat, and she _fell_. She couldn't even bring her own weight.

She took a couple of breaths.

He spoke, "Maybe you should be back at your—"

"You're leaving." She mumbled as she buried her head on the crook of his neck, struggling with her breathing.

He felt like something was wrong, but didn't comment on it. "Aa."

"Thank you, Sasuke-kun," she mumbled as she shifted on her position.

He looked at her. Her eyes were closed, her head on his shoulder. She looked peaceful, if it weren't for the heavy breathing she was doing. _Peaceful_. Something that he thought he could attain with revenge.

And then he noticed the glittering white band on her finger. A ring made of pearls.

"Sakura..."

"I hated him at first, you know," she was smiling. "And it's funny because he actually _understood_ me. I mean, you did, before. When we were younger. Telling me I'm not useless..."

 **Sakura, you must have noticed first, right? Your analytical ability and genjutsu know-how, is the most improved on our team.**

"Sakura."

"But he could see _through_ me. He knows me somehow."

 **Your words might be sincere... but... I know your smile is fake.**

She sighed. Shifted again. "Sasuke-kun?"

"Hn?"

"I'm sorry, but you're not the one leaving tonight."

He frowned. Blinked. His mind tried to grasp what she said as he stared at her.

"I'm tired, tired, tired of waiting, Sasuke-kun."

 _Ah, Sakura_ _Haruno, the_ _girl_ _who_ _waited. Who_ _pleaded_ _and_ _cried—_

 **If I could had taken all your pain... onto myself to comfort you, I would have.. and here we are again, and still all I can do is sit here and cry. ...I'm so pathetic..! But.. Sasuke-kun! If I still have a place in your heart, no matter how small it may be... then please... I'm begging you** **—!**

"I'm tired of people _leaving_. He won't —I don't want him to be..." she trailed off, took a sharp intake of breath.

 _To_ _be_ _like_ _me,_ he thought wryly. And as he turned his gaze away, it hit him.

 _Could_ _it_ _be—?_

 **Never again. I already lost everything once before.**

"Sakura, what have you done?"

 **I don't ever want to watch those dear to me die before my eyes again.**

"I'm glad _he_ didn't make me promise _anything_. Lest I regret what I did."

Poison. She poisoned herself. One of the prized medics, one of the best kunoichi in the village. Hell, in the whole world. Poisoned herself.

 _No._

"Sasuke-kun, you'll stay for my funeral, okay?"

 _No. No. No. No. No._

"And you'll bury me beside him. _Please_?"

 _No. No. No. No. No. No. No. No._

"Sasuke-kun, just... just this once... please make my wishes come true."

 _No._

He closed his eyes, took a deep breath.

"I'm _dying_ anyway."

He sighed.

 _No._

"Aa."

She snorted and giggled breathlessly. "Ah, Sasuke-kun, my fairy godfather. Or friend? My fairy god _friend_? Kami, it sounds weird."

He smiled. Softly. Just like Sakura, to be wondering about _that_ of all things before she _dies_. "It does."

"Sasuke-kun..." Pouting.

He felt like he was genin again. Doing low rank missions on what was basically his family then. Spending time with them. With _her_.

He chuckled.

—

Her funeral was huge—he didn't expect so much, so many people to be coming. These were the people she helped along the way, the people who also helped her in return. She had come a long, _long_ way from the lovesick girl she was during their academy days.

"Teme. Here."

He left early, not wanting to see her body lowered to the ground.

He traveled for some distance, knowing the shinobi of Konoha would probably chase him again, and stayed at a tree branch when he was tired.

A sketchbook. That was what the dobe gave him. He frowned. Still, he opened it.

It was sketches. First of Team 7—the new one—as a whole. Sometimes fighting, training, eating. And as he flipped through the pages, he realized the subject of the drawings changed, focused on a certain girl. And then more pages. And then he realized the drawings were not mere black and white sketches anymore. This was paint, clear with colors. It was like... It was like, in the artist's mind, how the girl grew more colorful and brilliant each time he painted her. How lovelier she became. The last picture... The last picture was a picture of her, standing at the midst of people at the street. Everything was perfectly detailed, but the girl's eyes—they were the most striking. It was her eyes alright. The brilliance and hue of it; it was all _her_. And she was smiling, running ahead of the onlooker, but looking back. Probably urging one to _hurry up!_

He smiled and let his hands run over the picture. " _Sakura_..."

* * *

 **A/N:** forced ending (I think?) But that's over and done with (and at least its not as angsty as the original plan was). BTW, this was originally just gonna be SaiSaku with the DanTsu story because I was scrolling through tumblr and on my dash I saw Tsu with Dan and the next post Saku healing Sai and I was like... _Why_ _not?_ But then I went to the SasuSaku tag and saw screenshots of Sasu almost killing the cherry blossom so it turned out to this. Bless. And yes, Hinata and Naruto are sorta kinda on here? But Sasu still doesn't know who Sai is? But he's mad at Konoha. And Saku is engaged to Sai. Idk. Yea, let's not care about the timeline.


End file.
